I had the opportunity to hear one of my pieces played by musicians from the Fort Worth Symphony. Here it is…

I feel pretty successful with the detox. I have cut down my caffeine intake substantially. I actually had a small cup of coffee the other day and got a headache from drinking it instead of from not having it. I am also not drinking any more sodas, especially dark ones. I’ll be honest, it is hard not to drink coffee but I have been able to ration it into smaller servings. I claim this as a victory!

I have decided to go on a caffeine detox.

You probably know that I am a person who loves coffee. I don’t love it for the caffeine, mind you, I love the taste. However, I have come to the conclusion that my caffeine intake it too great. Generally, I drink a generous portion in the morning and I have gotten into the habit of maybe a soda at work, or another cup of coffee. Comparatively, I think I am in ok shape (haha) but I am still going to cut down on the amount I consume. My strategy of choice: Cold Turkey… they says its the hardest but I am willing to take the challenge.

Currently I have a slight headache and coffee seems to be following me everywhere I go! So wish me luck!

I am a server at a restaurant here in Fort Worth. Servers don’t make much money at all as far as salary is concerned. We really do live off the tips that we make each night. And anyone who has ever waited tables will tell you that it is very easy to fall into stereotyping customers into categories of who will and who will not tip well.

All this to say I had a table tonight who I thought would not be good tippers as soon as I saw them in my section. I still served them as best I could; being cheerful, talking about the weather, filling their tea before the glass was even half empty, but I didn’t expect much. After they left I picked up the ticket and saw that the man had tipped me $20 on a $60 tab… 33%!!! I was stoked. I then told my friend Micaela about it and told her that I just felt blessed by this man… “What a blessing!!!” A little while later I was looking in my waiters’ book and noticed the man’s name for the first time. The man that had broken by stereotype and really blessed my evening is named  W.A. Blessing.

Mr. W.A. Blessing certainly was a blessing to me tonight. It was one of those moments where I felt as though the Lord was reminding me that He is everywhere and to be grateful for all that I have. In this job it is very easy to feel entitled to other people’s money but it is called service for a reason. Service is a gift to others no matter what. (Disclaimer: please continue to tip your servers… they got mouths to feed) I just hope I can continue to find joy in the service I do, wherever, and whenever, regardless of the reward.

For over a year now I have had a restless feeling. I feel like I am wasting time but I don’t know what I should be doing instead. Last year I thought that I needed to move and begin work on a Masters degree so in August that is what I did. However, here I am in Texas at Southwestern Seminary and I feel restless. I am not saying that I was wrong to move, in fact I strongly believe that moving here was the Lord’s will for my life. Still I find myself asking that most unanswered question of all time, “Why?” “Why” doesn’t change a dang thing though. I keep reminding myself that “it is what it is.” But even that statement is lacking when I find the “what is” in myself.

Acts 8 recalls the story of Phillip and the Ethiopian Eunich. An angel of the Lord tells Phillip to go to the road that goes from Jerusalem to Gaza. As Phillip travels down the road he meets the Eunich, explains the Scriptures, watches this man surrender to Christ, baptizes him, and to top it all off is carried away by the Spirit of the Lord.

I bring this up because it is a passage that has really encouraged me throughout this past year. If I had been Phillip I would have been thinking that the reason the Lord sent me down this road is because He had a plan for me in Gaza but God’s plan wasn’t the destination. It was the journey. I need to remember that. I have learned so much this year. I have met wonderful people and seen amazing things. I have shared about the Lord and realized how often I rob Him of glory. I am learning to rely on Him solely because I have nothing and no one else. I thought that by moving out here I had reached my destination but now I see that this is just the first stop. I don’t know how long I will be here but I need to be here fully while I am. It will be what He has set forth for it to be.

Epiphany of the day: Things here in Texas are very different than they are in California. No one here is in a hurry, driving is absurd and everything closes at 9. But after going home this weekend I realized things in California are very different too. I saw a man taking a stroll down the freeway with half of a shirt on and another man standing under the “shade” of a burnt down oak tree just yards away from a healthy oak tree with plenty of shade. Conclusion: People are just weird no matter where you are.

Going home was amazing this past weekend. It was so good to see friends and family. I went for Brenden and Lindsey DuBois’ wedding, which turned out beautiful. We spent a couple days before the big day in Palm Springs where it was really hot but there was NO humidity so I thought it was great. I also got to spend a couple nights at home. It was great to have some friends/family come up Sunday night since I didn’t get to see anyone before I moved to Texas. Here are some photos… Enjoy!

Stinkin adorable Emma Molsberry!

Lindsey and I... she looked amazing!

All the ladies!

Pastor Walter of course got me an essential for my seminary career... Religious Nerd Repellent.

It is official. I do not live in California anymore, for a while at least. I live in a weird state called Texas. It is very different here. Everyone talks to you like they know you. Now, this can be a good thing but it takes a while to get used to. I am sure people think I am really rude but it throws me off every time. They also talk very different. Sometimes I don’t understand what they say, again making me seem very rude because I say, “What?” a lot.

So, I had wanted to have all my school things in order before I went to camp so prior to the summer I had my housing all lined up. About 3 weeks into camp I found out my roommate wouldn’t be attending Southwestern in the fall. We had no cell service at camp and no extra time so I put off finding a roommate until after camp. I left camp on Monday, August 10th, made it to Beaumont in incredible time, spent Monday night and Tuesday at home and got in the car on Wednesday morning to drive to Texas. The housing department had given me a few names of girls who were interested in roommates so I called a couple of them. We got to Fort Worth on Thursday afternoon and I met with the first girl I called Thursday evening and we decided I would move in. The Lord does provide!

This week I have mostly been starting classes and painting furniture, which I have posted pictures of. I did also have to buy a new computer. The screen on my old one was going bad last spring and I just prayed at the beginning of summer that the Lord would allow my computer to work through camp. He totally did and it didn’t last much longer than that!!! But it is a good thing because now I have a camera in my computer. Skype date anyone?

I am beginning the process of meeting people, searching for a church, finding a job, getting used to humidity and being in class again. Sometimes it seems to be a lot to take in at once but I am trying to trust and believe that this is the right decision for now.

This is my amazingly comfortable bed that I stained and put together!

My house.

The lock on my door that is annoyingly hard to manuever.

So believe it or not I did have good intentions on maintaining my blog while I was at camp but I soon realized that was an unattainable goal. If you’ve never worked camp, let me tell you… it’s busy. Oftentimes, it came down to a choice between blogging and sleeping, (please note that this choice was usually presented between 12am and 2 am) so obviously I chose sleep.

Camp was an incredible experience that was unlike anything I could have expected. At the end of last summer I didn’t think I would ever have an opportunity to work camp again. However, the Lord had other plans. FUGE called me last October and asked me to interview to be the director for Jenness Park, which is the camp I grew up going to. I interviewed, was offered the job, applied for it (a little backwards of course) and began the process of what would be the most stretching, challenging, humbling, honoring, and rewarding position I have ever held.

Hourly we got to see the Lord move in our students’ lives and our own. It amazes me how we, the ones who minister, often learn more than the ones we minister too. This summer our theme was faith, but as the summer progressed I found myself talking more and more about grace. “For by grace you have been saved through faith.” They go hand in hand. We are allotted a measure of faith only by the grace of God and we trust in the grace of God only because of the faith He has put within us. Talking about one is like singing the melody of a song. It is beautiful on its own but it is immeasurably enhanced by the intricacies of the harmonies that weave their way in and around it.

Can I just brag on my team a little bit? Thanks. They are incredible people. The months leading up to camp I made phone calls to each of them, except one…oops. Anyway, every time I got off the phone I would say to my roommates, “I like this person a lot!” We were a perfectly constructed puzzle. Of course you don’t get that many people together without some personality conflicts but these individuals kept the Lord as their focus and knew that they were at camp for the students so didn’t let any petty issues prevent them from the work at hand. I truly love them. I miss them. I would be honored to work with any one of them again. It was a special thing knowing that the only time we had together on this earth was this summer. I made some special friendships that in the course of 2 months have changed me and enhanced my perspective of life.

The Team!

Mega Relay

Love These Ladies!

What a good looking staff!

In the morning I will leave to work Centrifuge at Jenness Park. I get to work all summer alongside wonderful people as the director. I get to lead adult bible study and recreation and see many students’ lives changed by the gospel. I am very, very excited about what is to come. I will try to blog but to be honest, it will not be my first priority! Keep us in your prayers!

Tonight I spent some time with a good friend, my guitar. Its been a while since we had some quality time so it was pretty refreshing. I sat in my living room, playing and singing, with the roomies sitting around listening and checking Facebook. I went and pulled out my binder of worship songs from high school. I started playing through them just reminiscing with Jenn about all the different songs we sang and loved. All the memories started flooding back about when and where we sang those songs. The pages themselves felt sandy from the countless beach trips that folder went on. It made me think of the alters that were built in the Old Testement to remind God’s people what He had done for them. These songs are like alters. They remind me of the times I doubted, hurt, rejoiced, and waited.

Thank you Lord for consistently working in my life through music. Thank you for the songs that make me remember and Your love that is worth celebrating over and over again.